Confidence comes from within...

Somewhere in the last year I lost my perspective on where confidence comes from.  I seemed to be dishing out advice to my friends about confidence, but forgot to listen to myself.  For some reason I was looking for confidence in all the wrong places...from other people.  Walking into my first year of college I had confidence and that confidence helped me make the wonderful friends I have today.  Somewhere along the way I was gaining "fake confidence."  When I say fake confidence I mean sucking up the attention people were giving me and mistaking that for confidence.  I look back now, and I realize I have not made as many friends as I did back in my freshman year.  

It struck me tonight as I was sitting around waiting for a phone call, that I knew would never come from a certain person, I realized I needed my confidence back to be content with me being alone.  And when I say alone that does not just mean without a signifcant other, but it means that I am truly alone, no friends, no family, no roommate in sight, and I just need to be confident with me alone.  I am ready to go back to my old ways of being confident without anybody else's help.  I will never be alone in the fact that I will never be without a support system, but my support system can not give me my confidence anymore.  I need to find my own confidence and strength from within, that is when I will be at my happiest.

This confidence does not mean I will be some person with my nose turned up around others, but it will keep me better in tuned with my friends, family and loved ones.  I will be a better person for not only myself, but for the people around me.  

Confidence here I come!